We’ve all heard horror stories about mothers-in-law from hell, whose only goal seems to be striking fear in the hearts of anyone they deem unworthy, while tormenting those around them. Really, we are in 2016 but still experiencing the mother-in-law from hell.
I was listening to the radio station recently and they were talking about things that women endure in their marriage because of outside people intervening. This lady called in and expressed how her mother-in-law has treated her badly from the day she started dating her son. Apparently they started dating at a very young age and the son had been meaning to marry her but her mother-in-law was refusing. Worst of all, she mentioned that the husband comes from a very Christian background and apparently the mother did not like her the day she laid eyes on her.
Turns out the mother-in-law wanted another girl to be with her son. Is that fair though? The treatment she received was absurd. She was even requested to do a paternity test on their first born baby boy because the mother-in-law refused to accept the baby as her grand-son, even after her son confirmed it. Mother-in-law used to call her names yet she still remained in that relationship. I listened with disbelief. Finally on her deathbed, the mother-in-law confessed that she did not like her... How cruel?
A friend of mine also had a horrible experience with her mother-in-law which drew her to the point of divorce. He was her only son so I’m thinking maybe she did not want to let go of him but he loved my friend so decided to marry her and they had 2 kids.
I remember her telling us that whenever they went home for Christmas holidays, this mother-in-law used to take out all the washing (including blankets and curtains) so that she may wash them, iron and hang them back. After that she’d need to get up the walls and clean them, finger prints and all. Thereafter dinner awaits. She practically had no time to sit down and relax for a minute. How cruel guys really?? My friend was required to do this every day until the holidays are over and mind you, this is in the rural area of the Eastern Cape, where most of the time you cook outside especially when there’s some ritual being practiced.
Other mothers-in-law even have the nerve to give these horrible names which indicate that you are not welcomed in their house. Who the hell gives someone else’s child a name like “Nohotile, Nomsebenzi, Nobunzima etc...” My Xhosa peeps would relate to these names.
The one Xhosa Makoti once said to her mother-in-law “Yabona ke mama, andizanga kuchitha umzi wakho, obehlamba i washing aqhubekeke, obevasa izitya aqhubekeke and obecleana aqhubekeke, mna ndize endodeni yam” which translate to “Mother-in-law, I’m not here to mess up the schedule, the one that was doing laundry must continue, the one that was washing the dishes must continue and the one for cleaning the house also must continue, I’m not here for all of that, I’m here for my husband only”
I guess the Makoti was explaining the ground rules, considering these abusive stories I hear of mothers-in-law from hell.
http://www.sheknows.com shares how to deal with the mother-in-law from hell:
Have you had a horrible experience with your mother-in-law? Please share and perhaps you have are building a relationship with your in- laws?
What is the husband’s role in all this?
By Theo
Unfortunately my mom in law is a gift from above but I have seen the ugliness of mother in laws also daughter in laws can be another story though. 1. A friends mom in law has been awful to her long before they were married but what I observed was that the son/husband also witnessed this treatment from his mom at first he thought it would go away but it wasn't instead it was getting worse...he sat his mom down told him that I am going to Mary this woman accept it and whatever issues you have with her kindly resolve them...the woman on the side was also starting to have a negative attitude toreadors the mother, the man again sat his girlfriend soon to be wife down made it clear that whatever she has said or done she is still my mother there is nothing that you can do to change that, I fully understand that you feel your attitude might be exempted but no..respect my mother like you would yours and I will standby and support you however be reasonable. Mother in law didn't like being put in her place and the girl also felt he was being unfair but in a long run the relationship is civil, they have been married for a number of years and no the mother doesn't love her but respects that she is the woman her son chose in return the girl honors her as her mother in law.
Husbands don't always know how to put their women in place be it its the mother or the wife/girlfriend. My thing has always been we are human we try our luck with life and push boundaries every other day with no ground rules most of us would have fallen off some cliff by now but we are regulated so all relationships need structure, the man are the pillars of this particular relationship they need to acknowledge that.
2. Daughter in laws are mean...these girls hear stories from their friends come into a household are accepted with love but she is still holding on to what her friends told her many moons ago about their personal experiences, some of these girls really have no idea what they want but they were told mother in laws are monsters and they dig for trouble do things they wouldn't normally do to their own mothers. So ladies lets check ourselves before we start judging other people.
Man must be ready for these struggles, you know your family better than I do, chances are you know better than your family be the unifier...importantly lets just be civil in case we are not crazy about each other just show respect.
I have a monster in law, worse her daughters are in on it. My husband has 4 sisters!! Ka re 4 and they all hate me. Basically because I didn't beg them to love me. When I entered the scene they said the ex is better than me. The mom cried and begged hubby to take the ex back. So I wrote them off !
Now that their bro/son married me they wanted a relationship with me . I told them 'no thanks ' . I mean I survived this long without them why would I want them now when it suits them. Mxm . So now they go around telling ppl my husband married such a horrible person who doesn't like people . All the LOLz
It is hard for the hubby I must admit coz he lives a double life. With me and with them coz ga re kopane asihlangani niks. Family functions of any nature I don't attend mainly because the ex will be there. I haven't seen any of them since 2014 at my wedding & I ain't complaining .
That's so horrible Anon. I hope one day all of you can find peace for the sake of your husband. Mother in law must apologise to you.The ex is still in the picture? attending family functions. Why can't she let go, he's chosen to marry you now not her
How does your husband interact with your family..?if you don't mind me asking
You are truly right, the husbands must be able to put either the mother or girlfriend/ wife in place when one is doing something wrong and must not be driven by emotions. I think in the heat of everything, all the parties involved get driven by emotions.
I don't have a mother in law, however I do have grandmother/aunt- in law etc and they have been nice to me. These are horrible stories we hear about these mothers-in law.
My mother had a horrible experience with her inlaws. I grew up witnessing the horrible way they treated her and that stuck with me. When I got married, I was ready to sort out anybody ozondidelela and I do, when I feel they have stepped the mark, but shame they have no major issues at all. Its just that I find that I am always waiting with baited breath for them to slip up so that I can sort them out, lol. Our relationship is each to their own, we meet if we must but not really because we miss each other etc. Andifuni nobanika ichance yokundiqala mntakabawo
uthi akufuni kwanto ikudibanisa nabo tuu...I'm glad there's no issues though
Sometimes it can be the sisters making your life hell. My grandmother LOVED(she passed away in 2012) my mother BUT my fathers siblings hate her for no reason. I haven't seen or spoken to them since the funeral, even at the funeral they did not talk to us or even acknowledge our presence. Only God knows and I leave it all to Him.
How do people live with themselves with such hatred?
MAKE YOUR EX-LOVER FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU AGAIN WITH THE HELP OF THIS SPELL CASTER,,,,